Step one for new mothers:
Take every piece of advice that is given to you with a grain of salt.
As a new mom, you are going to be inundated with advice from burp cloths to how to feed your child to things that you didn’t know that you needed to worry about (and probably don’t need to worry about, but what if?!?) like which books do you need to start reading to your baby while they’re still in the womb. So much advice will be thrown your way that you are going to become stressed about which ones to take and which ones to throw away.
My advice is this: grab hold of one or two blogs/books/persons and take their advice and only their advice. When I say this, I don’t mean that you can’t ever deviate from those places/things/people, but you don’t need twenty people giving you advice on the same things. There are too many people out there with too many opinions (yes, even me and my opinion) that you will get mixed up and way too stressed! Been there, done that!
Follow your gut.
I know, I know, everyone says this. But it’s true! I don’t know how it all actually works out, but once that child of yours comes into this world, you just know things. You will not be perfect! You may have to try a few things before you get it right. But you WILL know what is right for your baby and you. You’re thinking that you’ve stumbled across a crazy person’s blog right about now, but even though you have, this is true. Your gut will guide you in the right direction, if you trust in yourself.
Don’t fall into the trap of comparing your story/nursery/pregnancy to what other mom’s are going through/looks like/happens.
My pregnancy was a miracle. I was told that there was a very large chance that I wouldn’t be able to conceive a child, but I had a promise from God that I would have a cute, curly haired girl running through my house. My husband and I tried for over a year by ourselves before reaching out to my gyn for help. I had to go through 3 different pills and had even given up on those when one last pregnancy test changed all of that. This story isn’t the same for everyone, which is fantastic!
My pregnancy was filled with intense and long lasting nausea and vomiting, flu and pneumonia, fainting spells, and pre-eclampsia. I know plenty of women who breeze right through without an ounce of issues, and some that have it way worse than I did.
My birth story was 27 hours of labor, a failed epidural, a husband who could have been a bit more helpful, bed rest afterwards, a baby with a broken collarbone that no one caught until after we had left the hospital, and high bilirubin counts. It was so stressful! But again, there are stories of moms not making it through the birth, or the baby not making it, or happy, easy labors.
Are you getting the picture here? No story is the same for any two moms. So stop comparing notes, please. Talking about your experiences is one thing, but comparing them will do you no favors. This goes for your nursery set up as well. Those posts on instagram and facebook are pretty, but most that I see are totally not workable for a real life nursery with a real life baby and mama.
One thought on “First things first”
So true! It was so helpful to me to hear experiences and advice from others, but then you figure out what works for you and your baby. It might not be Pinterest perfect, but your baby will think it’s just right. 🙂